Wednesday, March 28, 2012

The Do's and Dont's of Southern Girls

The Dont's to a Southern Girl:
  • Do not change the station if Josh Turner, Tim Mcgraw, Luke Bryan, Toby Keith, Keith Urban, Jonny Cash, Lady A, or any other country artist is playing on the radio.
  • Do not step on her cowboy boots
  • Do not Hit her because she will hit back harder with a 12 gage
  • Do not Cheat on her. Southern girls are very hateful and creative (Miranda Lambert, Taylor Swift any   country girl singer)
  • Do not hurt her in any way because guns do not kill men the father behind it does
  • Do not anger a southern girl. They like to get even rather than get mad
  • Do not tell a southern girl to "be a good wife" or "be a good women" and get back in the kitchen. Anything along those lines of sexist comment. We learn at young ages how to use a shot gun.
  • Do not say anything mean about our families. Again the whole family has shot guns, even the 5 year old.
  • Do not tell a girl she should not be driving a mans truck, again southern girls hate when boys thing they are better than they are.
  • Do not do dip or smoke. We think it is nasty and ya'll are just babies with pacifier to shut you up.
  • Do not bring up or make comments about PMS because if we are PMS-ing then we are more inclined to shoot you twice.
  • Do not tell us we can't do something or we can't go because we will turn around and prove you wrong even if it causes damage to other things.
  • Do not tell her to dress up and look like a lady. If you don't like what she is wearing then leave. We don't need a guy who thinks is bad to wear a baseball cap and jeans. We know when to dress up and we will when we feel like it.
  • Do not ask to drive her truck. She will let you know when you can drive her truck and when you do get to take that as an honor.
  • When you text her NEVER text her "love ya"or "ILY" or anything shorten like what the heck you love her but you can't type out "I love you"
  • NEVER EVER ignore her when she is crying or down because another cowboy can take her away faster than you can say come back.
When you hear her yell "oh HELL NAW" just run for your life
The Do's to A Southern Girl:
  • Always go in to say "hello" and "goodbye" to her parents.
  • Ask her if she wants to go mudding, fish, hunting, or target shooting.
  • When you're in your truck have her sit in the middle seat next to you or if you can't do that hold her hand
  • Always make the first move
  • Always kiss her goodnight
  • Always treat her as an equal
  • Bonfires are the best date
  • Spend time with her father. If he don't like you then you are screwed
  • Always help clean up after a meal. That is the universal sign to her parent telling them to get out of the kitchen so ya'll can finish cleaning and have alone time on the porch
  •  Just agree with her or nicely tell her you disagree but she is never wrong
  • Take her for a ride on your big green tractor (not the lawn mower)
  • When she tells you her favorite country song, listen to the lyrics and that is how she wants the dates/ relationship to go. (That is the good thing about country songs you don't have to think about the meaning it is like a map to a girls heart)
  • Always text her little cute lovey things like Honey, Babe or good morning beautiful or something.
  • When sitting next to her have your arm around her and kiss the top of her head or something
  • For a wedding present: a new rifle, fourwheeler, or handgun better be from you.

Friday Times

Friday nights in Fuquay are just like any other normal Friday nights... Well I thought at least. Guess my Friday nights are different than other people's, so my friends say. Friday after school I had my friend Kirsten and her boyfriend John, Sam and her boyfriend Branden, and Braeden come out to the house to hang out. I told them we had to go to Walmart first to get supplies for that night. Walmart on Friday night is where most people go to hang out in Fuquay, Though I still do understand why. I wanted to go out to Walmart early before all the crazy people came. So in John's Monster truck, John, Kirsten, Braeden and I headed out to walmart. We put Kirsten inside the shopping cart so we would loose her. I pushed her in the cart for a bit then Braeden took over because my shopping cart skills sucked.  We went up and down the aisle in Walmart trying to find stuff to make smoore's with. I started to play keep away form the rest of the group and I think they were doing the same. People in Walmart thought we were crazy but didn't say anything. Sam and her boyfriend were going to meet us at Walmart. When we finally met up with them they were laughing at us because we looked like "rednecks in our natural habitat" as Sam said.  The guys paid for the food and the girls went back to buy some other things. When we, the girls, were done we went outside to find the truck and it was nowhere to be found. The boys had left us in the parking lot. Alone. With the other creep rednecks that had started to congregate in the parking lot. Our boys where honking the horn wanting us to go find them and walk all the way to them. ( heck no) So we sat in the middle of the Walmart parking lot waiting for them to come get us. As we were waiting very nicely the Rednecks that were in their trucks, ready to party, came up to us and tried to pick us up. ( Men this is why you don't leave your girlfriend in parking lots). Kirsten and her big mouth got them away and finally our boyfriend had come and gotten us.
      After our Walmart trip we went up to bullfeather where my brother works to get more food. I got some tea while we waited for our food to be cooked. Braeden and I were sharing a drink and when the drink was out I asked Timothy, my brother, for a refill. He refilled in and gave it to me and I gave it to Braeden. When he drank the tea he started to freak out. I thought he was going crazy but then he tells me that there was something else in his drink. Tim busted out laughing and told him he put hot sauce in his cup. Boys will be boys I guess.
      After we left there with our food we went down to the pond to go fishing. Yes, fishing with a rod and reel and all. Fishing I think is relaxing and it gives me time to do what I want. My parents respect the fact that I like to fish and leave me to stay down there for hours and hours. Fishing is something that relaxes me and makes me feel like I can do what ever I want on my terms so when I am mad and feel like I am loosing control I go fishing because it is one thing I can control. I like to take friends also because its something new and most of the time, something they have never done. You don't have to be a pro at it to catch anything you just have to have time and wait for the right fish to come along. Well When we were down there Sam caught the most fish and John caught one. After we were done fishing we went into the cow field to get some old Christmas trees to burn back up at the house. We put two in the fire pit and watched them go up in flames. My mom was freaked out about how high the flames were going and made us put water on the fire so it would not get up so high.
       Sitting at the bonfire was fun. All the couples were together and then we started to have a water fight. Well I hit Kirsten with water them we got into a "fight" (more like playing around) then John/ Braeden came and dumped a whole bucket of water on us. After Kirsten and I got cleaned up for like the 3rd time that day we started to settle down and everyone coupled up again and we just sat around talking. This is when I realised how great life was down in the south. In the south people are friendlier and they like to slow down in life and take it easy.  Neighbors watch after every one's children and the children are always free to explore and have fun but are safe at the same time. Teens can have get togethers and hang out and not worry about if they look ok to go clubbing and stuff. Teens can do a lot of fun things that do not include getting in trouble.  In the south things are simple, Safe, and laid back. I would not want to grow up anywhere else in the world. (by in the south I mean Fuquay).

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Prom?? and Drama Class?? Together?? Ninja?? How do these fit together? Well everyone but me knows

           I feel like I write about my boyfriend a lot.... Oh well.... So while at the play my school was putting on My boyfriend and Me thought it would be a good idea to hang out at the show. Hannah Perspective: So he told me to be there at 4:30. I thought I was going to ride with him but he didn't offer and so I made plans to hang with my friend. My parents text me right after school and told me that they wanted me to ride with them and they would bring me to the Play later. I thought I was in so much trouble, so I took my time getting to the car. I thinking what the heck did I do, then I was 
afraid my parents were going to give me "THE TALK" either way I did not want to get in the car. So when I got in the car I was like am I in trouble and they told me to they wanted to spend time with me.... Yeah I didn't trust that but I went with it. I got home and got ready then when I was time to go My parents would not leave! I was yelling and screaming telling them telling them we had to leave but they wouldn't go. My dad left to get my sister and I told him I could go with him and he yelled at me telling me to stay. He said that he and my mom had to go to drop me off. I was so mad I was walking around the house in my heels pacing back and fourth. I was super pissed off. I was telling my mom how stupid men where and how they all ways do things the hard way. Finally he got home and we left but instead of going up 401 highway he went the longest way possible. (up lake wheeler) this is about 4:30. I was so mad because I wanted to spend time with my boyfriend and I thought my Drama teacher would kill me. I got a text from my boyfriend and he asked me to look up where the word chesseborrow comes from... I was like.. REALLY!!!! and I didn't look it up. So we get there and I thought I was so late but them we saw actors walking in (its 5pm at this point) I asked one of the actors what time the play started and he told me 6:30... Oh lordie I turned to my boyfriend who was in the car with his sister and yelled across the parking lot " Braeden your in trouble!!" and I start to walk away and My dad hangs out his window and yells for me to came back. I was so mad my head was spinning. I went back and then my dad was like "I thought you said it started at 430  what are his intentions with you Hannah?" and starts to unbuckle. I told him it was my fault and I went to my boyfriends car so we could get something to eat. We get back to the place were the show was going to be held and did our normal jobs. My boyfriend was dressed up and the night before he told me to dress up. I was kind of happy and kind of mad that he wanted me to dress up. " I don't have to dress up to be with him What the heck!" but then I thought maybe my drama Teach wanted me to dress up so I didn't say anything. Intermission comes up and then everyone started getting jumpy and my boyfriend was avoiding me. My thoughts: he is going to dump me oh crap. Everyone wasn't talking to me but they were just looking. So my boyfriend is like you are going to help me with the raffle. We are in like a half way room with one of my friends/ actors and he was jumping and stuff and I was like he is pumped for the show (even though it was like his 7th show that week).We go up and we do the raffle and then he says while standing in front of the whole audience (like 80 people) we have another thing to do.I looked at him and I was like no we don't and I was kind of ready to leave. Suddenly one of the girls who were working the show comes out with flowers... in my head "what the hell is going on". and my boyfriend taps me and is like Hannah Look and then I see a light on the ground saying "Hannah Driver Prom??" I was so shocked and surprised. I don't remember saying yes but I gave him a hug and we walked away. I am very good at figuring things out but he REALLY got me. His mom, dad and other sister came to talk to me but I was still speechless. I bet they thought I was a bit rude but I could say anything to them. It took a good 10 minutes to get back to normal talking Hannah. Later we talked about how he did it. My boyfriend Perspective For what I got:  So he started to make the side to go on the light while talking with me on skype one night and told me it was a picture for his mom's work he had to do Lie#1 later that week he called my mom while I was on skype with him. He left the room and told me to talk with his sistesr while he talked with his mom. ( His sister made sure I stayed in my room on skype with them while my parents were down stairs on the phone with him) Lie #2  Then he told everyone in the drama program what he was doing and he told me to dress up because he knew what he was doing. When I was trying to leave the house my parents knew he wanted me there around 5pm so my parents were stalling. My dad took two wrong turns in down town (he has lived there for all his life) and when my parents called me back to the car. It was so they could text him and tell him that I didn't know what was going on and he was in trouble for giving me the wrong time not that I had figured it out. When I asked about was time intermission ended one of my friends started freaking out and was like "InTeRmIsSiOn oh lordie 5mins till intermission ends and YOU and Braeden get to go do your thing!!!" she was going crazy and my boyfriend took her and then told her to calm down but I didn't hear that. The actor that was jumping around.. He was jumping because he knew what was about to happen and was happy. He had his sister tape the whole thing and take pictures... I couldn't believe he set this whole thing up.... I have to start being more careful with this guy because he is very Tricky and smart.... This is how I got asked to Prom!
    

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Fuqay vs Boyfriend

           So after my boyfriend asked me out he started coming around the house more... (dur) but on his first real trip to Fuquay he brought his sister (she really liked cows and wanted to see the cows in my backyard). So we went out into the wood with a BB Gun and were on a search for cows. We found them but they kept running away except one of the cows.... He was the bull and really wanted to get us. We made it out of the woods and then went to the pond. We started shooting a bottle in the pond then my boyfriend decided it would be a good idea to shoot me in the butt with a BB gun. He said it was "Fuquay flirting" so being the best Girlfriend in the world I shot him back in the leg. His sister and my Sister were there and we decided to shoot them too. I shot my sister in the leg but I cocked the BB gun a bit too much and then ended up making her bleed. My boyfriend was a bit nicer to his sister and when he shot her it left a little mark and no blood. Then my boyfriend moved to geese to shoot across the pond but his aim was...well "altered " by the "wind" and "gun" so the geese lived. When we made it back to the house my Brother just finished fixing his truck so we threw some of the kids in the back of it and took a "ride". My boyfriend and I were also in the bed of the truck with the kids and my brother was driving. My brother went into the field and went over some jumps. You know in movies when things are flying through the air in slow mo. Yeah that is basically what I saw. All the kids and my boyfriend where slow mo in the air falling back into the truck. They almost looked like they were in space. My boyfriend landed on a 30lb chain and I landed on a kid and it looked like a bomb went off in the back of the truck. It was fun though. I drove the truck but my brother didn't want me to go fast but he let my boyfriend drive and I could see the Fuquay side coming out when he was driving that truck. It made me laugh because in my mind I was like " I bet he never thought he would be dating a country girl and be doing these kinds of things with her". Hey what can I say everyone loves a country girl <3 Now his sister is dying to come out to my house every weekend and his other sister is jealous because the other sister got to do all the "fun things".

Monday, March 5, 2012

Dating Hannah

         So my boyfriend will agree with me. I am the most difficult person to date. I like to be a difficult and a smart ass at the wrong times. When he asked me out we were skyping and I could tell he was trying to ask me out but I didn't say anything. Right when he was about to pop the question my brother busts down the door and yells, so he can hear "ask her out already!!!" and shut the door. I tried to turn off the mic before my boyfriend heard it but it was useless, he hear it. So instead of dropping it he asked me "what did your brother say?" and me being me, I told him that he said nothing and not to worry about it, but he kept asking so in my super coolness I tell him, "I forgot to feed my fish... umm.... I will be right back" and I leave for a good 5mins and come back, thinking he would have dropped it. No that boy didn't he kept asking and asking. Finally I just told him what my brother said. My boyfriend then tells me that he was about to ask me out before my brother came in. My answer "no you weren't!" and he said "yeah I was" and this went on for about 5mins, back and forth. He finally said "well are you going to say yes?" and I told him "yes I will go out with you but you weren't about to ask me". For almost everything I like to make things harder than they need to be. We were sitting and he asked if it was ok to put his arm around me, what did my big mouth say "yeah that's fine but you won't do it". Yes Dating me is full of smart remarks at the wrong times. My parents feel bad for him because he has to put up with me and my mouthiness. When he asked me to go to the movies with him on a "date" (he didn't tell me it was a "date" he just thought I would take it as that) I was pretty happy. I thought we would meet up and see then movie then go home... boy was I wrong. My parents made me text him telling him he had to come out to Fuquay and meet them. I am the first girl in my household to date someone in high school and my Dad wanted to make sure everything went right. He was listen to a song that motivated him for like a week. Some of the lyrics:
 "Come on in boy sit on down
And tell me about yourself
So you like my daughter do you now?
Yeah we think she's something else
She's her daddy's girl
Her momma's world
She deserves respect
That’s what she'll get
Ain’t it son?
Hey y'all run along and have some fun
I'll see you when you get back
Bet I’ll be up all night
Still cleanin' this gun"
Oh yes my Daddy wanted to pull out his gun and clean it and have a talk with my now boyfriend (at the time we were not "dating") I wanted to MELT into a puddle. To make matters worst I told my boyfriend that my Dad yelled at the first guy who tried to take me out because my dad didn't like him. Yes I wanted to be a puddle. THANK GOSH THIS DIDN'T HAPPEN! My date was early and my Parents were late getting back from the store, so when my date walked in my parents were also walking into the house. I like to say God was on my side. My parents tried to invite themselves to the movies too and my date being nice almost said yes to them. Thank gosh I stepped in and told them no. After my parents made some jokes about me to my date we (well I) Ran out out of the house.